RHODYVIEW IS FOR SALE
Well, its been a fun run, folks. In case you haven’t noticed, we haven’t posted shit in the last couple months. I guess senior year, drinking, finals, and all the other excuses caught up. I had a great time writing and I think I can safely assume that the other writers feel the same way.
This leads me to the main point of the blog. We would love to sell the site. I am 100% serious about this so send me an email if you are too rhodyviewblog@gmail.com.
The blog has a surprising number of subscribers and gets a decent number of views per month when you actually blog every day. So if you are looking to start off with a instant audience, here’s your head start.
By the way, this offer is valid to ANYONE. You could be an incoming freshmen at URI and want to continue the site. You could be be a fisherman in China and want to make the site about the PH levels in the Pacific Ocean. I’ll sell it to you. Not being biased. I’m giving everyone a fair shot. Email me with a fair offer and let’s make a deal.
One last Rhody Rhody Rhody! Freedom from school, Freedom for America!
Show Us Your RAK
Coming back to RhodyView for the first time in a while to post this video. If it gets a million views by the end of finals, everyone in the class gets an A. Not to mention, this is for a good cause. Who doesn’t love a good RAK?
Burnasty’s
Let’s talk about it. As a freshman, I am quite familiar with Sir Robert Burnett and his gross, inexpensive beverages. It’s seems legit. It seems like the real deal. Eight dollars for a 750?? That could last an average college student half a weekend, if not a whole weekend. For one bottle, that’s a pretty good deal. However, there are consequences to consider such as 1) increased chance of vomiting and 2) a painful ass hangover tomorrow. As one of the only freshman writers at RhodyView, I realize this circumstance would only apply to me but let’s pretend: it’s Friday (today!!), you want to get to get drunk but the only alcohol you could possibly buy is Burnett’s. What do you do?
Little Things
You know how everybody says the best things in life are the little things, appreciate them and all that? Well I think they’re right, but I also think the opposite is true. It’s the little things in life that will fuck your day up the worst. Here’s a list of some “little things” that will piss you off no matter what:
- your sock sliding down into your shoe
- getting to a dining hall and realizing you don’t have your student ID
- forgetting your chapstick in the winter
- losing ONE earring while the other one just sits their and teases you
- when someone you expect to text you doesn’t
International Women’s Day
Hey, I don’t know about the rest of you ladies but I’m pretty sure I’m a girl every day. More importantly, I think, I am a person every day. Celebrating women, men, and EVERYONE should be a daily practice, not just something saved for a fake international holiday. Also, the whole thing just kind of makes me feel like a second-class citizen. International Women’s Day is a dumb holiday. What even happens on International Women’s Day? NOTHING. The only way I would ever exploit this is to maybe get free drinks later. Maybe. Happy spring break everybody!
I REALLY Hate Self Taken Photos
I have always hated people who take self-photos on Facebook but recently I have noticed something even more annoying about them. Why the fuck do you think you can justify taking a stupid selfie with a description like “Selfie, to celebrate the snow day” or “New day, New me”? Those descriptions are useless titles that do not justify a single reason to upload a new selfie every 5 minutes. We know what you fucking look like, you are an attention seeking whore bag. Those dumb ass titles do not for any reason justify the attention seeking waste of Facebook space. Here are other examples of dumb ass reasons I have seen:
- “Selfie Sunday”
- “:)”
- “Time for class Selfie”
- “First day of work Selfie”
- “SWAG”
These are just a few examples of how people try to justify looking like a duck allover Facebook or taking useless selfie’s. For the sake of humanity, stop looking for the attention and actually interact with people in person for once instead of dwelling on your Facebook “friends” liking all of your shit.
P.S. You might as well title your selfies to say “Here is another fucking picture of what I look like with the same facial expression, please like it so I can get a self-esteem boost and stop worrying about my pitiful existence of a life”
Things I Will Never Understand: Online Dating
I’ve heard both sides of the argument. I have friends who have done it, but no matter what they tell me, I could never do it.
PROS
- meet a lot people in a short amount of time
- meet people you would ordinarily never just run in to
- skip over the people who seem uninteresting (and unattractive)
CONS
- cost. As if dating wasn’t expensive enough, you gotta pay for the dating website
- get catfished. Whether its to the extent of making up a fake girlfriend or just lying about age, weight, interests, etc, you can never really know how truthful the other person is being.
- lack of human, face-to-face, interaction. May not seem like a big deal in the beginning to some, but first impressions are crucial. You can’t skip over that.
I could keep laundry-listing reasons why online dating doesn’t work, but I won’t, because that’s boring. Here’s what I think. Online dating is a cool tool. I think if you are looking for a shallow, hook-up/one night stand sort of a deal, Tinder can be great. But if you expect to be in an exclusive relationship without ever meeting the other party, you are nuts. Seriously, you’re crazy and should be thrown in a mental institution. Why would you hold yourself back from experiencing the real pleasures (and pains) of real relationships? As nice as Skype is (if your girlfriend/boyfriend is real), it doesn’t replace a good blowjob.
PS: That MTV Catfish TV show guy is apparently coming to URI
Does Wearing This Sweatshirt in Hope Get This Guy Laid?
Let’s be honest girls. As much as you say that you’re looking for a “nice guy,” you know what you really want is an asshole. You may even read this and tell yourself, “no! That isn’t me!” But deep down, you realize that your need for approval will allow yourself (after a few too many at Bon Vue) to hook up with guys like this. Is he overweight? Looks like it. Does he have a plaid shirt hanging below the sweatshirt? Looks so. But the words on the back of the sweatshirt speak to you. It says “Hey, I’m an asshole and I don’t care. Now suck my cock!” This guy gets laid 10 times out of 10.
If You’re Gonna Get F*cked Up, Don’t Be an A**hole About It
Drunk Douche
Driving drunk is definitely not the smartest thing to do, nor the safest. But, if you’re going to do it, don’t be a fuckin’ douche about it. At least learn to gage yourself into a parking spot that’s head on before it drops into a ditch. I can honestly say that a blind cat could have parked that car better than this guy did. I mean if there was any clue of possibly not being able to get your car back out of the parking space, it would have been the bumper at the end of the spot. That part that you should be in front of… not over, or in this case see-sawed on top of…
When you wonder whether there’s hope for humanity out there, there usually is. But, if you’re gonna look for it, don’t start with this person. They’ll just mess up your day. Or at least your ability to park properly.
