Let’s be honest girls. As much as you say that you’re looking for a “nice guy,” you know what you really want is an asshole. You may even read this and tell yourself, “no! That isn’t me!” But deep down, you realize that your need for approval will allow yourself (after a few too many at Bon Vue) to hook up with guys like this. Is he overweight? Looks like it. Does he have a plaid shirt hanging below the sweatshirt? Looks so. But the words on the back of the sweatshirt speak to you. It says “Hey, I’m an asshole and I don’t care. Now suck my cock!” This guy gets laid 10 times out of 10.
I have no idea who this guy is. I have never met him or even seen him up close. All I know is that he is the biggest asshole on planet Earth. This jerk started flying his obnoxiously yellow kite on the quad today in the late afternoon. First of all, grow the fuck up! You’re in college. Men don’t fly kites. Boys do. Second, why the fuck is it so big? Overcompensating much? Like look how much of the quad he is taking up in this pic. He must be at least 75 feet away. He kept almost hitting innocent bystanders(or sitters) with his care-free, hippy, virgin flag. I can only assume that he assaulted no less than nine people today with his kite. I hope that the police were called and charges were pressed. Lock this guy up. He is a hazard to society and the American way of life! Freedom from kites. Freedom for America!